Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Thank You Queen Esther

Most of you know that I have been studying Esther with my dear friends Ashley Snell and Stephanie Helm. I am loving this study and wanted to share with you a quote from Beth Moore which was in last weeks homework:

" The most critical breakthrough of faith you and I could ever experience is to let God bring us to a place where we trust Him--period. We don't just trust Him to let us avoid what we fear most. We determine to trust Him no matter what, even if our worst nightmare befalls us. We have no greater victory and can render Satan no harsher blow."

I remember growing up I would lay in bed at night and say out loud, "I would just die if my parents divorced. I know I would just shrivel up and die and that would be the worst thing that could ever happen to me dear LORD PLEASE don't let me shrivel up and die of that!!!" Guess what!? My biggest fear. The biggest, scariest thing that I could come up with at my young age of praying that..came true. My parents divorced 6 years ago this month. My world came crashing down around me. I inherited debt I did not know I would have to pay back (student loans) a huge aching heart, a confused dad, a mourning mom, a grieving sister, and some very confused family members and friends. I took care of my mom as she battled with depression and my sister as she tried to grasp the situation. I endured endless sleepless nights and found myself gripping on to the word of the Lord with all that was in me. If you opened my Bible today you would find the book of Job highlighted all in yellow. I knew. That God was with me. I knew that we would make it. We did. My family emerged this holiday season in the brightest light I could ever have fathomed! I want you to praise Jesus with me that I did not suffer for one SECOND this holiday season from depression (and neither did my mom). This year it was celebrated that the Lord Jesus was born and came to bring us life and life abundantly and a new day came for my family.

I am praying for you in your deepest sadness and in your deepest fear that you will know that:
"if ________________ (insert your worst fear here) then God will take care of you"
"If _________________ then God has a plan"
"If__________________ then God desires to accomplish something monumental in me"
"If__________________ then God's going to demonstrate His sufficiency to me."

Praying for you today dear readers. I love you all!


  1. I am very HAPPY to read that you and your family had a FABULOUS Christmas and no one caught the depression bug!! That is just an awesome testimony!!

    I need all the prayer I can get. You know what kind of year I just had. Wheh. I am ready for a long break of hardships and sadness. Thank you for sharing that with me. I am still recovering and trying real hard to let God bring ME to a place where I trust Him--period.

    One baby step at a time.

  2. Amen! I want to do that study. How many times are you going to change your background. LOL

  3. As many times as I want to! :) I will keep this one a while now that the holidays are over. Do you like my new header??

  4. Personally, I love the new header. And, I love this story too. I will praise him with you. What good news :)

  5. This is awesome Jenny! Thanks for sharing and for your prayerful heart!

  6. How did you do that header? LOVE IT! WANT IT!

    Thank you for posting that quote. That is the one I posted on fb, just never sat down to blog about. So far that is my most favorite day! It really helped with a million things. Thank you for your honesty about your family and I am so glad things were better this year! The Lord works everything in HIS timing. You are a dear friend and I am glad you're doing the study with me.

  7. I enjoy reading what your heart has to share, Jenny!

  8. Jenny,

    What a situation to be in....
    This is the first time I have read your page and I must say that your story really touches my heart. My parents divorced when I was an infant so a one parent household was my childhood, although my father was around. However, last year my father lost a battle with cancer. Now I am seeing how my mother never had closure, even after 36 years. Very hard to watch. Along side the fact of a brother who is willing to write off 5 siblings for some money. I know things are happening for a reason, but the human side is still mourning and suffering while processing it all. I just wanted to say that I am very glad you were able to celebrate Jesus' birth this year with your family! And thank you for sharing something so personal!!